Feminism | The Laine List

On Kegels, Vagina Dentata, Vaginal Weights, and Squats

September 14, 2012 by Elaine Griffin 18 Comments

I was probably 12 or 13 when Cosmopolitan Magazine first taught me about my pelvic floor. Well, more accurately, they taught me about kegels, and how all women should be doing them to strengthen their pelvic floor, and also their vaginas! A pelvic floor should be strong. And so should our vaginas!

Shhhh, don’t tell anyone, but a strong vagina is the secret to pleasing YOUR MAN!!

Wait, what? Like, Vagina Dentata?

No, that would be too scary! Plus that is just some sort of weird, paranoid male fantasy and/or guilt complex.

Although I do find Vagina Dentata fascinating in a witnessing a horrific accident kind of way. Have you ever seen the movie “Teeth?” It’s a gem – run, don’t walk to find it on Netflix today!

Anyway…

Obviously, I was very passionate about my feminist ideals at 12 or 13, so I decided to write off kegels forever! If I’m going to be strong, it’s going to be for me. Plus, let’s face it, vaginas are invincible, yo!

Have you ever seen the quote by Betty White,

“Why do people say “grow some balls”? Balls are weak and sensitive. If you wanna be tough, grow a vagina. Those things can take a pounding.”

When she’s right, she’s right, folks.

Then this morning, I ran across this article on Facebook:”Stop Doing Kegels: Real Pelvic Floor Advice For Women (and Men).”Although I did read the article (it was mostly about pregnancy) I didn’t really need to. They had me at stop doing kegels, and the best part of the article was this quote by Katy Bowman, whose research influenced the article:

“Tighter does not equal stronger. It’s just tighter.”

See, even as a tween, I knew kegels weren’t the way to make me stronger.

Moral of the story? Put away your vaginal weights ladies, because apparently doing squats is really all you need to do to strengthen up your vagina errr pelvic floor. Plus, you’ll have really strong legs!

But ssshhh, don’t tell anyone!

Filed Under: Feminism, Uncategorized Tagged With: Betty White, feminism, Kegel exercise, Pelvic floor

A Call to Action: Let’s Turn the Negatives into a Positive

April 24, 2012 by Elaine Griffin 14 Comments

Remember my Miss Bimbo post from last week? Well, I can’t let it go. I keep thinking about how I mention to Miss Bimbo, “You have a forum where you could actually do good. You could have real conversations about fashion and self-esteem, and make positive impressions. But instead you choose to perpetuate the hate and negativity that is plaguing our youth.” And guess what? I’m no better, just sitting around complaining and DOING NOTHING.

I hate it, by the way, when people do that, and believe me, I’m surrounded by it. So I’m seriously seriously hating myself for making a bunch of proclamations – bitching, if you will, and not taking action. Note to self: I deserve my own throat punch.

Luckily I am in a position to do something about this. So I have a proposition for you.

I would like to create a clearinghouse, of sorts. Help me stop the war on our youth, our women, our men, and our society, by finding just one website that is a positive influence or does something to create and or promote self-esteem, confidence, personal peace, and/or equality, and emailing it to me or posting it in the comments section. If every person who reads this post and actually does this, and maybe…just maybe, passes it on to one friend, we could do a LOT of good!

And that is basically where the proposition ends. We do good, your name, if you choose, gets added to the clearinghouse. Wouldn’t it be grand if we could build a site totally devoted to doing right by our children? Just leading people in the right direction.

What do you say? I know you want to join me. I don’t care about your political affiliation, your religious or spiritual background, the color of your skin, your sexual orientation, your sex, your country of origin, or how many pets you have. I will even take a link if you like cats. In fact, the more positive reflections from different backgrounds, the better!

Let’s see how many links we can collect by the end of May and turn this negativity into a positive force!

Filed Under: Feminism, Uncategorized Tagged With: feminism, positive change, self worth, self-esteem, social change

Miss Bimbo: Here’s Your Throat Punch

April 12, 2012 by Elaine Griffin 13 Comments

I’m in awe of how far we stoop as girls, as women, and as people in general for a little attention. I mean, could we set the bar any lower for our children? This website, called Miss Bimbo, in my opinion, is one of the lowest of the low.

So I’m writing this post in response Kristin’s post over at Ten to Twenty Parenting. Her challenge, in conjunction with The Truth About Motherhood’s Throat Punch Thursday Series, is to band together to respond to this hideous display, presented to our youth, in the name of fun and fashion.

Dictionary.com defines “bimbo” as:

1. A foolish, stupid, or inept person.

2. A man or fellow, often a disreputable or contemptible one.

3. An attractive but stupid young woman, especially one with loose morals.

Does this sound like something you strive to be? More importantly, does it sound like something you would like your daughter to strive to be? Don’t have a daughter? Don’t fret, your son can become a “himbo!” W.T.F.

On this “fashion game” website, which boasts “2,865,250 registered Bimbos,” our daughters – and our sons – can create their own provocative images of themselves. They can dress themselves up however they want. They can wear as much or as little as they want. They can be bimbos and himbos!

Got a little bit of a mean streak in you? COOL! Because you can learn to fight cyber-style in duels. I don’t even know what that is because I felt dirty creating a profile so I could find out, but based on some of the comments I saw from users who had been in a duel, it’s what you would expect in this era of bullying and perpetuation of hate, fear, and negative self-worth.

So this is my message to the creator of this website. My throat punch, if you will:

If you want to identify as a bimbo that is your business. But promoting devaluing yourself to our and daughters (and sons) is just insulting, and a way for you to feel good about yourself. You are not building self-esteem. You are not building character. You are not providing an outlet for young people who love fashion. You are promoting the devaluation of our young, and perpetuating bullying, hate, and negative self-value. Somehow you missed the lesson on how good looks and knowing how to cat-fight don’t make the woman. Or girl. Or boy. Or man.

Further, you are providing yet another forum where our daughters can post provocative images of, and personal information about themselves for the world to see. YOU ARE PROVIDING A PLATFORM WHERE THEY CAN PUT THEMSELVES IN DANGER.

You have a forum where you could actually do good. You could have real conversations about fashion and self-esteem, and make positive impressions. But instead you choose to perpetuate the hate and negativity that is plaguing our youth. Wow. Don’t you feel so good about yourself right now? Probably, because none of these girls actually matter to you, other than they give you a few minutes of fame in the cyber-spotlight.

Did you really need to prove to the world you are a bimbo by putting others in emotional and physical danger? Congrats. Here’s your tiara.

Some final thoughts.

Believe it or not, in the name of feminism, I struggled with whether or not to write this post. I felt like the only way to write it would be to agree with the website owner that she is, in fact, a bimbo. And even though we have all done it, whether we will admit it or not, I’m trying not to judge women by their appearance or intellectual (in)capabilities.

On the other hand, the website owner hits right in the heart of my feminism. To me, part of feminism is being able to reclaim what once was offensive, oppressive, and/or objectifying. I don’t feel like I can assume she is doing that, though. So, while I think it’s fine for her to feel like or be a bimbo, and I think it’s okay for me to agree with her, I’m pissed that she’s presenting this as an option for my kids. Our kids. This woman is objectifying and oppressing them in the name of fun and fashion, and that is a no-no go-go. And so I wrote.

A note to parents:

Please keep and help keep your kids safe on the internet. None of this would matter if we would all pitch in and do our jobs.

What do you think? Would you be okay with your kid being a member of a site like this?