Today’s NaBloPoMo prompt is: Has anything traumatic ever happened to you? Describe the scenes surrounding a particular event. I’ve been kicking it around all morning.
I mean, I usually post really early and it is now almost noon and I’m just about done. I just could not decide what to write. Do I go with the trauma theme or do I skip it? Well, I’ll skip it because my trauma is not solely my own and I’m not going to dig into someone else’s wounds. Not today.
Okay, so, what to write about. Do I address the subject or write about how I want to make an infinity scarf? I decided to at least address the subject of trauma. TRAUMA. What is it? It’s what happens when you live your life. What makes mine anything anyone would want to read about? My trauma is generic and boring. People die suddenly. They lose houses. They lose babies. They lose half of their reproductive system. Life goes on.
Ultimately this has made me think about blogging and what kind of blogger I want to be. I read these really emotional posts and I think – holy shit, that person just bared their soul in the most beautiful way, and with millions of people. I want to be that kind of writer. If I’m even capable of being that great of a writer.
But you know, it’s really not about that. My writing is fine. Not outstanding, not horrible, but it’s me. People seem to enjoy it, and I don’t feel the need to analyze my trauma. It happened. I lived.
I’m just not that kind of blogger, and I don’t think I ever will be.